Until I started using twitter, I never realized how much women:

(1) had too much sex

(2) wanted to have sex with me

(3) or were willing to show me various parts of their bodies!

And there’s so many of them, they even have numbers after their names.

Wow, I am clearly a sexy, hot, and desirable kind of guy!

Now, if you want to talk about the kind of emails I get, well, that’s another story.

   

Rising unemployment in Japan has led to a sharp increase in underage avian prostitution in major urban areas. Often congregating at high-traffic locations like this bridge over the Nogawa River, pigeon prostitutes advertise their wares covertly by “coo-coo”-ing their unsuspecting “johns” for “quickies” under the bridge.

The National Police Agency claims their officers are helpless to combat this scourge, saying, “omawari-san are too busy giving directions, asking gaijin to show their gaijin cards, arresting dancing naked SMAP boys, and investigating crimes after they occur, so there.”